What is Mormon Soaking? (Explained by ExMormons)

You may have heard about “soaking” or “Mormon soaking” on TikTok or Reddit, where it has become a viral topic of conversation. This unusual practice is often associated with young Mormons trying to reconcile their intimate desires with the teachings of the LDS Church. But what exactly is soaking, and why is it connected to Mormonism?

What is soaking?

Soaking refers to the act of a man inserting his genitalia into a woman’s genitalia without any thrusting or movement afterward.

Why is it called soaking?

The term “soaking” originates from the idea of remaining stationary or “soaking” in place after penetration, without any thrusting or movement.

How did soaking originate?

Soaking has evolved out of Mormon purity culture. While the exact origins of soaking are unclear, it seems to be a byproduct of the intense pressure placed on young Mormons to remain sexually pure.

Mormon doctrine teaches that sexual relations should only happen within marriage, creating a strict moral framework around physical intimacy. By not fully engaging in intercourse, one might lessen the guilt or shame that could result from breaking church guidelines while still participating in some form of intimacy.

Is it Mormon soakin real or is it a myth?

There’s been a lot of debate about whether soaking is a widely practiced phenomenon or just an urban legend. Some ex-Mormons claim that it does happen, while others dismiss it as a rare or exaggerated practice.

However, online communities, particularly on Reddit and TikTok, are full of stories and jokes about soaking, lending credence to the idea that it’s at least somewhat prevalent within certain groups or that it has become a practice since becoming viral.

Why is it so viral online?

Soaking’s virality can be attributed to the sheer novelty and absurdity of the idea, which intrigues people who are unfamiliar with Mormon culture or intense sexual repression.

Videos about soaking have reached millions of viewers, sparking conversations about the lengths some individuals will go to in order to navigate strict moral codes.

Is soaking considered a sin by the LDS church?

Although the LDS Church has not explicitly addressed soaking, it is clearly a violation of the church’s guidelines, which forbid sexual relations of any sort outside of marriage. Although it’s not a loophole that would hold up well in a church disciplinary council, someone may try soaking to alleviate their own sense of guilt and shame that can come from purity culture.

More Mormon loopholes and sexual terms

The Provo Push, jump humping, or bed jumping

Named after Provo, Utah—home to BYU—this term takes soaking a step further by involving a third party. The idea is that a friend jumps on or pushes the bed, causing movement without the couple having to actively engage in thrusting. This way the couple can rationalize that any resulting friction is not their fault.

Levi Lovin’ (or durfing)

Levi Lovin’, also known as durfing, involves dry humping or grinding while clothed. This is another workaround, often justified by the fact that there’s no direct skin-to-skin contact.

Garment-dodging

Members of the church who have participated in special temple ceremonies are required to wear “garments,” special underclothing consisting of an undershirt and underwear. Garments are to be worn at all times except for certain circumstances such as swimming, bathing, or rigorous physical activities. Some members will exploit these exceptions by doing things like planning a rigorous workout at the end of the day and wearing gym clothes without garments the entire day leading up to the workout. This loophole is called garment-dodging.

Sexual Euphemisms and Other Terms

Within the church, many euphemisms or other unique terms are frequently used for sexual topics. Here are a few of the most common terms:

• Immodesty: Behavior or dress deemed inappropriate because it could incite sexual attention.
• Law of Chastity: The church’s formal rule forbidding sexual relations outside of marriage.
• Moral Cleanliness: Refers to maintaining sexual purity and avoiding impure thoughts.
• Moral Danger: A broad term for any behavior or situation that could lead to breaking the law of chastity.
• Moral Transgression: A softer way to describe sexual sin or inappropriate behavior.
• Necking: Passionate kissing and physical affection above the waist.
• Petting: Physical touching below the waist, seen as a precursor to sexual sin.
• Provo Push: Heavy petting or dry humping, often in an attempt to maintain technical virginity.
• Purity or Virtue: Commonly associated with a woman’s sexual purity and moral character, closely tied to modesty and chastity.
• Same-Sex Attraction (SSA): The Church’s term for homosexuality, focusing on the attraction rather than the identity.
• Self-Abuse: A euphemism for self-pleasure, framing it as harmful to one’s spiritual well-being.
• Self-Gratification: Another term for self-pleasure, emphasizing the selfish nature of the act.
• Struggles with Chastity: Refers to someone experiencing sexual urges or desires outside of marriage.
• Unworthiness: Refers to a state of spiritual impurity, often related to sexual sin, which disqualifies members from participating in temple rites or other church ordinances.

Discussing Mormon Sexual Slangs

Conclusion

The rigid sexual guidelines of soaking often foster intense repression among Mormon church members. Any failure to meet church standards is always seen as the member’s fault and can result in feelings of inadequacy and self-loathing.

Members frequently respond to this by entrenching themselves even more deeply in the culture that is promoting their own guilt and shame. This perpetual cycle can be difficult to escape and at some point, wild ideas like soaking become an attractive method to meeting one’s sexual needs while rationalizing actions that may not be approved by the church.